Quest

I have been thinking about quests, the topic we have been working on for our presentation, and my life in terms of them.  All of our stories in terms of them.  A quest is a voyage of discovery, a path that we take- willing or not- that leads us to a place we need to go.  (And back to one of my favorite quotes 'we get to the places we need to go'  a truth).  Along the process of the quest we experience the heroic cycle- the leaving, the trials and helpers, the death and rebirth, the return triumphant.....only to leave again.  Stories old as time, and they are true be it for the Alexander the Greats of the world or the person next door.  The wisdom in it is to view our lives as a series of cycles, not a line with a start and arrival point.  And cycles change.

I wonder what my questing cycle is?  I will have to think about it- I know that I have been The Fool (adventure), The Magician (knowledge and power), The Hermit (introspection), The Empress (growth and motherhood)....maybe others.  And there are those that we are- the quests we are on to discover the aspects of our nature- and the events that happen to us.  Events are *not* quests in themselves, they are part of the trials on our particular quest.  I am excited about this idea, and wish I had the day with my computer and books and sketchbook to play with it- but I must move along to the reality of school and work and responsibilities.  But first~

The quest that I *think* I am on at the moment is that of The World.  The world is synthesis- finding the connections between different things and weaving them into some sort of unity.  Exemplified by the rules of 4- four seasons, four elements, four alchemical humors, four archangels, four anchors of astrology, four states of matter (solid, liquid, gas and plasma)....and on and on.  Four is the number of stability, and right now I am questing after stability- of income, of career, of school, of marriage, of relationships, of environments- I am wanting things connected, balanced, settled.  I am also looking for the connections in things- I don't want it all settled through separating the different parts of my life, but through interweaving them so that each part makes the rest stronger. I view these aspects as the rules of head (intellect, education, school/work), heart (marriage, friends, family, relationships, intuition and creativity), home (income, environment) and health (physical and mental well being).  I am remembering now something that I used to draw constantly for a time when I lived on the island- a type of house doodle that exemplified all of these things- so now I have discovered that this is not the first time I am on this quest, but a returning cycle.  Interesting.  Exciting.

You know, I love writing like this and sharing these thoughts with you, with myself- because I let things swirl around and go otherwise.  I think them and they vanish, I vocalize them and they fly away- but if I write it down I can keep them around....and share them with you.  I couldn't imagine having this conversation with most people ~ not that it wouldn't be fun, but just that conversation tends to stay to typical topics.  What have you done? Eaten? Gone to? What is the weather like? How is...?  Which is pleasant and necessary, but not terribly exciting. (for the record, right now I am eating these same things daily: Greek yogurt. An Orange. Tuna with Hot Sauce. Lots of coffee with Almond Milk.  Salad with a protein for dinner.  Diet tonic water. So far I've lost a bit over 15 lbs, but interesting? not so much).  And also- I have a cold that has settled in my head- my ears are full of cotton and I can't hear much of anything. (Solved that in the classroom by having a student be my 'ears'- they repeat questions/statements that I can't hear so I know what is going on- adapt, adapt).   Anyway, I am glad that we can share thoughts like this- even though I know it is a bit one sided- after all, I just write, you read if you choose to, and sometimes respond ~ the important thing is, that we are sharing, and that makes me feel safe and well and centered.  Thank-you.