Wander/Wonder

First spread in progress.

"Nothing is perfect, final, or fixed in this material world."

Hectic (of course) beginning to the semester- zillions of new kids, plans, reinvented wheels and much to do.  But I did make some decisions and begin to draw some limits, and I feel the better for it.  So far.  I did resign from the writing team for the museum- as much as I love to write and work, I wasn't doing a very good job and was overly stressing.  Likewise, at the end of this year I think I am going to resign from being the curriculum lead for the arts- I have done it for several years now, got us over the transition to the new curriculum (well, by the end of this year), and am tired of the responsibility.  I want to take a break from leadership and just focus on teaching again- both online and in the classroom.  And I want to make art.

I *do* have art that needs made for school- Meg's portrait by Friday (did I mention- like a kabillion times before- how much I hate to do portraits?) , the HOSA flag.  My smart kids have already begun the prom stuff, so I am easing off there.  Just need to get these things wrapped by the end of the month and then THAT IS IT (besides prom and MY stuff).  Selfish?  Maybe.  I'm ok with that at the moment.

Anyway, I did begin an altered book, which I haven't done for years.  I love doing these- and was inspired to give it a go by one of my kids.  Crystal is in the creative writing class, and I was snooping the syllabus, and thought 'hey, I really like these assignments!  I haven't written like this for awhile- might be fun'.  They write and then put the finished work into an altered book format, and I love that as well.... so this is my treat.  I am going to play with the creative writing, play with this book (which is titled 'Making it All Work' which is rather appropriate), and just have some non-committal fun. If it turns into something great, yay, if not, that is perfectly ok as well.  I tell the kids to practice and play with  their art- while I practice all the time (and play) in my sketchbook, I sometimes forget to play 'outside' as well.  This is my format for doing so.

Oddly enough, the first page I turned to had a phrase that caught my eye: "Nothing is perfect, final or fixed in this material world."   It is like a fortune, a reminder- you can't always fix things, perfection is impossible  and nothing is ever 'done' - not in a depressing way but rather in a way that ensures that the world is always dynamic, growing, changing.  Nothing lasts forever and that is actually a very good thing- we have to be open to constant evolution of ourselves.  We are not the same as yesterday, and we will be different tomorrow- and it is OK to quit holding on to patterns of behavior that are not working anymore, even if they once defined success.  That is my lesson right now- I worked very, very hard to get to the top of my profession- and I met those goals.  This change doesn't mean that I am a slacker- hardly not- but that I am ready to shift that energy elsewhere.  And this, this is my start.