Back to School!

A photograph of Ariel that Neena took and altered last year- it is one of my favorite images, the color and expression, capturing an age in light.

School began today- first student day... it's almost four, they are gone and I'm exhausted. I never feel that I know what I'm talking about- even when I do- I am settling in with this group of kids and some are already testing me. Some already are at home here... most of the art 2's, the little artblock class that are like my own. The art ones have to get used to me, and it sucks that I had to be mean the first day- but when someone tests you the first day you have to be firm with boundaries. In charge. Then we had extra time because time is all odd again, my class clock is NOT in synch with the school clock and I never could wear a watch. Ran over in homeroom and art 2, cut it short in art 1, and artblock ended up talking about Ted Kennedy and the super-model murder. At least it was current events!

I want to do things differently this year, shift focus a bit. I get tied up though in change from what I've always taught (which is now easy and familiar) and what I want to teach (my big ideas) and reality (no supplies- but I can cope with that... and enthusiasm-suckers who make me tired...a bit hard to be all 'go' when someone is sitting there rolling their eyes at you and wishing you into teacher-hell). ... I'm tired now though, still have to do ECU stuff, but I can do that at home with Manz and doggs and boy and kitten, surrounded by comfort. And without wearing teacher shoes.

All in all, it wasn't a disaster of a day, just a long one. Class sizes are small due to computer error- either they will stay small (Yay!) or mushroom into monsters (ick)... I feel guilty when I have small classes though- am used to ginormous classes which are easier in a way. In large classes I can just give directions, be stricter... in small classes I get distracted (Kennedy and boob implants) or have a difficult time with the more formal aspects of instruction. It will resolve itself though- I know I am a good teacher, just need to get rolling.