Happenstance

Happenstance it was that Charles had a gift for me yesterday~ he brought me an onyx sea turtle, of all things. Without knowing the turtle dream (I tell my dreams everyday, but not all of them- the man can only take so much). But it fits and creates a sort of echo, a sign of something meant.

Today is the first day of school, and last night, this morning I am full of... something. Anxiety? yes and no because it is nothing that I haven't done a million times before, and nothing much is happening for the next three days except endless meetings. Excitement? yes, but it is all balled up with wanting to get things done and doing what they want... blah blah blah. Tired of talking about it, tired of thinking about it. Summer's over, get on with the program, another shift in seasons, another day. I'm going to be doing this for the next 16 years at least....

That's a long time and no time. And then what? Haven't a clue- like the turtles, I swim to shore every year, crawl up on land, hatch a new batch of young ones. Go back to the sea. Do it again. What do turtles do when they retire? They live forever- barring mishaps- and I am fair confident that I will live a very, very long time. (Grendel had best have a good job to support me).... I'm only at the half-wayish mark, still have far to go. Still excited every day- good excited/ bad excited, point is that I get worked up about life, and all it's little things. Sometimes it wears me out, sometimes I get so wound up that I can't unwind and I end up babbling (like now. ya think? maybe two hours of sleep last night, and I'm a champion sleeper.... but I finally got warm enough without stealing *all* the blankets) I love the man and sometimes I wear him out, but he is patient and good and listens and tells me when I am out of orbit. I will spin back to center, spiral down and slow.... but never, ever stop.

There's a song he likes, about how one person is steady and still while the other one is always in motion. I like the song because I recognize that aspect of us- he is steady and calm, the eye of the hurricane. (guess what part I am). Without the wind, the eye would not move. Without the eye, the wind would not be focused. Together, we are unstoppable.